Lovleigh

and then…

First you find out a house you fell all-over inlovewith (one word) can not be yours, and then you weep, and every other day after that you think of why it might be ok followed by why it is the worst thing in the world, mostly because you had your wedding all planned for the day after you held the hot little front/back door key in your hand, and then you live a few more days and it doesn’t crinkle up your heart so much in the morning anymore, and then (since you didn’t buy a house) you buy a car - with a sunroof - and an after-market radio that feels like luxury to you even though it has a few dings and sunroofs don’t mean quality but its still a step, right? and then you hate your new job at first, and slowly,slowly the days go faster and you forgot you hate it but you don’t quite love it and you’re not married (yet) but today you got to run errands (the veterinarian, groceries,bank) with the man you love and sit in the grass watching three beagles dart around the yard eating old corn cobs and trying their darnedest to lick that man you love who is desperately allergic to them but grins anyway, and then you notice that your stomach settles a little more (even though you didn’t know it was unsettled) at the thought that houses aren’t everything and neither are cars and that nothing in the future can ever be everything. only today can be everything.